Roll Call: Latest News on Capitol Hill, Congress, Politics and Elections
November 1, 2014

Stockman Offers Up ‘Dog Ate My Taxes’ Bill

stockman 445x246 Stockman Offers Up Dog Ate My Taxes Bill

Stockman pokes fun at the IRS with his “Dog Ate My Taxes” bill. (CQ Roll Call File Photo)

Lame-duck Texas Rep. Steve Stockman offered up a tongue-in-cheek rebuke of the IRS and its handling of the missing Lois Lerner emails Friday, introducing “The Dog Ate My Tax Receipts Act.”

Under the Stockman proposal, taxpayers who do not provide documents requested by the IRS can claim one of the following reasons:

1. The dog ate my tax receipts

2. Convenient, unexplained, miscellaneous computer malfunction

3. Traded documents for five terrorists

4. Burned for warmth while lost in the Yukon

5. Left on table in Hillary’s Book Room

6. Received water damage in the trunk of Ted Kennedy’s car

7. Forgot in gun case sold to Mexican drug lords

8. Forced to recycle by municipal Green Czar

9. Was short on toilet paper while camping

10. At this point, what difference does it make?

Stockman’s bill comes after a tense Ways and Means Committee hearing earlier Friday in which Republicans ripped into IRS Commissioner John Koskinen, with Rep. Paul D. Ryan, R-Wis., telling the former Clinton and Bush administration official, “Nobody believes you.”

The full text of the Stockman resolution:

Whereas, the IRS claims that convenient, unexplained, miscellaneous computer malfunction is sufficient justification not to produce specific, critical documentation; and,

Whereas, fairness and Due Process demand that the American taxpayer be granted no less latitude than we afford the bureaucrats employed presently at the IRS;

Now, therefore, be it resolved that it is the sense of the House of Representatives that unless and until the Internal Revenue Service produces all documentation demanded by subpoena or otherwise by the House of Representatives, or produces an excuse that passes the red face test,

All taxpayers shall be given the benefit of the doubt when not producing critical documentation, so long as the taxpayer’s excuse therefore falls into one of the following categories:

1. The dog ate my tax receipts

2. Convenient, unexplained, miscellaneous computer malfunction

3. Traded documents for five terrorists

4. Burned for warmth while lost in the Yukon

5. Left on table in Hillary’s Book Room

6. Received water damage in the trunk of Ted Kennedy’s car

7. Forgot in gun case sold to Mexican drug lords

8. Forced to recycle by municipal Green Czar

9. Was short on toilet paper while camping

10. At this point, what difference does it make?

In any case, IRS can see the NSA for a good, high quality copy.

 

  • LukeinNE

    Who said it was tongue in cheek? Pass that sucker!

  • Sam Sung

    Despite what media fortune-tellers have conjured up, catastrophe will not ensue if the US government is prohibited from borrowing more money

  • Stan Bozarth

    I suppose it’s too much to ask that instead of bloviating about the IRS, Congress would actually revise, simplify, and provide some sanity to our tax code.

  • Jon Johnston

    If the US government stopped adding new debt, and then paid off a $1 billion of existing debt per year, it would be debt free in 17,000 years

  • Bill May

    Got erased with the other 17 minutes of Nixon’s tapes.

  • virgie

    Whoever it was on here that recommended the website Bionic Traders I want to say thanks. You are right they have been very helpful to me in learning to trade. I now have hope that I can quit my job and trade full-time. Trading is not as hard as I thought it was but it helps to learn from the right place.

    • http://none.com Jack Everett

      more spam

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